Thursday, October 27, 2011

Thankful Thursday - Recognizing my blessings!

Words have escaped me these last couple of weeks with Jessica's passing and I haven't felt much like writing.  I'm realizing though, that as hard as it is to accept, life does move on and while we will continue to grieve we will also heal...

In the spirit of that I thought today a good day to recognize how much I still have to be thankful for!!  The number one thing is the amount of grace and out-pouring of love that has come from all of our family and friends in the face of Jessica's tragedy.  I could never have imagined how many lives she had touched in her 12 years and am in awe of it.  I know that my sister and her family (and myself) would not be coping nearly as well without all the grace from the prayers that have been unleashed for them.  How can I not be thankful, grateful, humbled by that?!

My children remind me every day how thankful I need to be.  They are both miracles to us and for however long they are entrusted to my care by God, I am blessed. 

Fall is in full swing and I've been noticing it finally this last week.  The smell of the leaves, the crispness in the air, pumpkins on the porch... everything was hidden from me because of my sadness is starting to creep back into my consciousness... I am thankful for that because these are all things I LOVE about fall.

Ok - that might seem like a short list but it fills my cup for this morning, for which I am also thankful.

A picture of my sister's kids with Karen from fall a couple of years ago to end my post...

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Miss you Jessica {Wordless Wednesday}

This picture is several years old, but wanted to post it today nonetheless.  I miss you sweetheart!

Monday, October 10, 2011

Trying to understand

... this is a hard post to write, but after today I need to get some of it out of my head... we had a beautiful weekend celebrating Megan's second birthday - a party on Saturday at my sister's house with my folks who were visiting, all three of my sisters, and my sister's family.  A second party yesterday at our house with most of my husbands family.  Happy times all around.

I was going about my day as usual today and received a phone call from my sister that our 12 year old niece had collapsed this morning with a severe headache and had to be life-flighted to the local children's hospital.  We found out just before lunch that she had suffered severe bleeding on the brain from an AVM (arteriovenous malformation) and her prognosis is not good.

I am trying so hard to understand God's plan in all of this... I trust His holy will for our families... but it is so hard facing what may become an inevitability with Jessica.

Lord, grant me the grace to accept your will  but know that I am currently praying with my whole heart that it is not the road that currently looks like it is before us.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Happy Birthday!

My sweet Meg turns 2 today!  It is so hard to believe 2 years have already gone by!

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Frogs!! {Wordless Wednesday}

This weekend the girls had their first "catch" on the farm.  They found a frog while playing outside with their Daddy.  They were THRILLED, to put it mildly, and a little beside themselves when it decided to hop out of their bucket and make a break for it...

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Finding some structure... an update!

So I posted last month how my lack of structure and routine was starting to kick my butt... well, I got sick on top of it and then it REALLY kicked my butt!!  So... I'm giving you an update on what is developing in my life with regards to a routine (ack! structure!) ... and surprising myself with how much I'm liking it!

A caveat before I lay it out... this is a rough outline which obviously needs to be filled in some places with more detail.  I expect that to happen as we get more used to living within a routine!  Secondly... as with most things, about the time you feel like you've figured things out something comes along to throw a wrench it in it... I realize that this will more than likely happen to my "beautiful" plan, but if I continue to use that as an excuse not to make one, I'll be in the same place I was a month ago!

Sunday - Church and Family Day
Too often right now, Sunday's are a our "make-up" day for outside chores, inside chores, etc.  I would love to get back to what Sunday is supposed to be, a day of rest (which with my husband's farming and soon-t0-be coaching schedule - he needs!) and family "fun" - whatever that entails.  

Monday - Appointment and Errand Day
Karen has Speech Therapy and every other week I will be having my OB appt. until Crider Baby3 makes his/her appearance.  It's an hour drive one-way, so this is a minimum of a three hour round trip for us.  I plan to try and do grocery shopping and/or town errands this day if it works

Tuesday - Home Day!! 
With all of our running around, I'm starting to cherish these!  My goal on Tuesdays is to be more structured in my play with the girls and to tackle one "project" ... I use the word loosely as it could be something as simple as carving out an hour or two to work on my quilt, tackling a closet that needs organizing, catching up on our budget, etc.

Wednesday - School, Appointments, and Errand Day
Karen has preschool and then we have to leave by 10 for her 2nd speech therapy session.  My goal is to try and have myself ready to go so that when Megan and I come back home from taking Karen to school, I can focus on other things in the house besides getting ready!  I would like for Wednesdays to be my "quick" cleaning day... doing those weekly cleaning items like bathrooms, a quick run through with the vacuum, etc.  I should be able to do this (if I'm not trying to get ready) in the two hours between when I take Karen to school and pick her up!  Since we are in town again, this is another opportunity for groceries and/or errands if I'm organized!

Thursday - School and Home Day
Karen has preschool (and speech therapy at the school).  She is dropped off between 8:00 and 8:15 - then Megan and I have three hours before we head back into town to pick her up.  This time can be used to 1. spend some one-on-one time with Megan, 2. tackle something that is hard to do with 2 little ones underfoot, or 3. engage Megan in something so that I can have some time to "myself" to catch up on reading, housework, blogging... :)

Friday - Another Home Day!! 
Yay!  I'd like to follow my plan for Tuesdays with the additional item of completing any household items (cleaning, laundry) that are outstanding so that we go into the weekend with a fresh house!

Saturday - House Day
We have soooo many little and big house projects that we are hoping to get done before the weather changes and the baby comes.  If I do a better job during my week of taking care of the every-day items, we can use this day to focus on these projects (and maybe I'll be able to carry some of them into my Tuesday/Friday routine!).

I feel like this is a pretty reasonable approach to putting some structure into our daily life.  As you can see - the structure is kind of already there because of Karen's appointments, but I was still flying by the seat of my pants most days.  This gives me something to work towards. But what do you think?  Am I being as reasonable as I think or does this sound like I'm setting myself up to struggle?!  I'm praying for the former!